A relationship is like a long trip and, as Dan Berrigan puts it, "there's bound to be some long dull stretches. Don't travel with someone who expects you to be exciting all the time!..

The recognition that, in love, we cannot not disappoint each other is what makes it possible for us to remain inside of marriage, friendship, celibacy, and respect. It's when we demand not to be disappointed that we grow angry, make unrealistic demands, and put pressure on each other's moral and sexual integrity. Conversely, when we recognize the limits of love, when we accept an inevitable separateness, moral loneliness, and disappointment, we can begin to console each other in our friendships and our marriages. In that consolation, since it touches so deeply the core of our souls, we can, in fact, begin to find the threads that can bind us into a oneness of heart beyond disappointment.(Father Ronald Rolheiser)